My brother, Daniel Neal Elsberry, would have been 39 years old today. Instead, he was murdered at age 30.

There’s a lot of adjustment that happens after a violent act. I’m still dealing with it.

I ran across a picture of Daniel that shows him back at my parents’ house in Lakeland. He’s sitting in the kitchen on a stool, with our two cockatiels, Niomi and Chrismon, climbing on his shirt. He’s smiling at the bird on the front of his shirt. It’s a moment that helps me remember my brother in a role other than victim of violence or in some of the less pleasant times we had. There were times when Daniel would surprise us with sensitivity, and this one I’m describing from the picture was one of those.

Time moves on, and me with it, leaving further behind the young man in the photograph. But I think it is right for me to pause and think back on Daniel, and think to those who are still with me. There is time now to also recall them, and to resolve to make some memories between us.