Remembering My Brother

My brother, Daniel Neal Elsberry, would have been 39 years old today. Instead, he was murdered at age 30.

There’s a lot of adjustment that happens after a violent act. I’m still dealing with it.

I ran across a picture of Daniel that shows him back at my parents’ house in Lakeland. He’s sitting in the kitchen on a stool, with our two cockatiels, Niomi and Chrismon, climbing on his shirt. He’s smiling at the bird on the front of his shirt. It’s a moment that helps me remember my brother in a role other than victim of violence or in some of the less pleasant times we had. There were times when Daniel would surprise us with sensitivity, and this one I’m describing from the picture was one of those.

Time moves on, and me with it, leaving further behind the young man in the photograph. But I think it is right for me to pause and think back on Daniel, and think to those who are still with me. There is time now to also recall them, and to resolve to make some memories between us.

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Wesley R. Elsberry

Falconer. Interdisciplinary researcher: biology and computer science. Photographer. Husband. Christian. Activist.

5 thoughts on “Remembering My Brother

  • 2005/10/29 at 10:22 am
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    I just wanted to say how very sorry I am about your brother’s murder. I can only imagine how terrible it must be.

    Did they get a conviction on the suspect?

    -Karen

  • 2005/11/03 at 6:02 pm
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    I too lost a brother to a bullet twenty five years ago on Oct 11th 1980. He would have been 51 last July. He used to wreck all my stuff and smile about it. I really miss that smile. Fortunately I have two older brothers.

  • 2005/11/06 at 3:26 am
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    Karen, they convicted the guy that I mentioned on that page as being arrested, but only for manslaughter. They built a circumstantial case, but were hampered by the fact that the murderer had apparently ground down the shotgun used. A witness testified that the murderer had bragged to her about how he had used that method to eliminate the murder weapon.

  • 2005/11/11 at 12:03 am
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    I just came across your website. My sister was killed by a drunk driver on Nov19, 1995. After all of these years, I still have a tough time with it. I miss her and I’m still pissed off at the drunk drivers (yes, BOTH drivers were drunk). Everyone in that crash died. Every single person died. No survivors. Time helps ease the pain, but it doesn’t take it away.

    Hoping you find peace.

  • 2005/12/08 at 7:18 pm
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    Wes, I had no idea you had lost a brother. My long-belated commiserations.

    A violent death must be horrendous to cope with – I pray I never have to do so. I am still, 40 years later, dealing with the death when I was 11 of my father after a 5 year illness. So I guess that a suddent death leave much greater ripples.

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